I don´t
understand how people don´t know.
Recently, I
have been answered so many I don´t know´s to questions that were really not
that difficult. I wasn´t asking things like “What is the global economy going
to look like in 5 years?” or “Who do you think will win the next election in Belize”
or “How many of our friends do you think will still be together in 15 years?”.
My
questions were more about what people think, what they feel, why they liked a
certain thing.
I have a
friend who just returned home after a year spent abroad in my country. During
the months we have known each other, he told me a few times how he fell in love
with Sweden when he went there on a spontaneous short trip a few years ago. So,
just before departing with him on a short vacation -probably moved by a latent
desire to figure out what we could possibly want to do or see during the
upcoming travel- I candidly asked him “What is it that you liked so much about
Sweden?”
“I don´t
know”.
We were
sitting in a park, on the side of a pond. It was a peaceful and lazy afternoon
during the week, and only students and pensioners were strolling around us. His
answer made me think of one morning in my freshmen year in high school, as my
teacher told us one thing that made sense to me more than most of the theories
and facts that I was later asked to learn.
“We read poetry,
here” she said, raising her voice as to catch our attention. “And literature
that made history. It can be excellent according to the critics and yet it can
mean nothing to you or you might even detest it. Or you can love it. It actually
doesn´t matter, as long as you are able to explain why. Nobody is here to tell
you what is good and what is not. You decide for yourself. But you have to know
why”.
I was
surprised at this random recollection and deep inside I thanked my teacher for
that statement because I understood that back then she planted a seed which would
allow me to appreciate my life experiences more.
Surely you
can just like something without asking yourself why. Ultimately, it´s not that
you are constantly expected to justify your perception of the world. It´s more
subtle, though, it´s a deeper, broader level. It´s like activating a million synapses,
if you can explain to yourself why you are experiencing a pleasant moment. Or even
an unpleasant one. If you question your perception, you better understand
yourself and what surrounds you.
And being
able to give words to this is nothing but enrichment. For yourself and the
others.
I promise
to myself that I will always make the effort to find a better answer than "I don´t know".
Showing posts with label Valuable thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Valuable thoughts. Show all posts
Thursday, August 21, 2014
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
radical generosity
Stories: the only
thing we’ve got, the arbiters of this human process of rocketing between hope
and despair, and it’s why every person’s is vitally important. It’s why it
doesn’t matter if you’re a mess, or put together, or even a success according
to arbitrary standards; what matters is that you are conscious of the world
around you, in all of its terrible beauty.
[…]
The world can be
a horrible place at times, but we don’t have to participate in this, we don’t
have to harden our hearts as we’re taught and told to do, in order to survive
or be sexy or attractive lovers or perfect parents or interesting people. We do
not have to make ourselves into mysterious gifts, waiting to be chosen or read
or understood by those who will earn us, unwrap our secrets, and then what? We
can be something more authentic, and speak from a different place, a different
planet. This is why I like being a writer, because what it demands is both
simple and incredibly hard. To be a human being. Does anyone even know what
that means anymore? Why don’t we allow for mess? Why are we so afraid of it?
What do we expect from the veils we pull down over our eyes, our minds, our
hearts? How can we possibly connect if we never let people see what we truly
are and what it would take to make us free? Now, when I can’t fake a single
emotion I don’t feel (or at least not for long), I wonder how I’ve lived this
long being any other way. Maybe it’s that I haven’t really been living, and
that now I am like Adam, like Eve, my feet still wet from being newly created,
awkwardly learning how to walk on dry land.
[…]
What does it mean
to be human, at this time, in this country? I believe it means practicing a
radical generosity and empathy, especially when it’s a struggle. You must look
around in the soft darkness of your waking life, which is the partner of your
dream life. You must understand that accompanying you always is your animal,
primal, complicated, desire-driven, calm but desperate, brutal and brilliant
self, blinking and breathing gently in the dark, waiting for you to let it into
the light.
Beautiful words by Emily Rapp
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